Episode 9.1: Bad@Love’s Summer Beach Read: Hollywood Wives – (aka, Horrible, Horrible People)

Yes, summer is just about over, but that is about how long it took Mallory to read one of Tamu’s favorite author’s, Jackie Collins’ classic,  Hollywood Wives. Since the book was very long, this will be another two-parter.

Morals to the Story: Go down on one another, and, don’t let anyone into your house.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

  • There were too many characters for Mallory.
  • Everyone’s life was tragic.
  • Podcast Shout Out: Mouse and Weens living their Hollywood and San Diego lives. Please checkout their hilarious podcast.
  • Hollywood Wives contains loads of pedophilia.
  • Hollywood Wives contains homophobia – 80s style!
  • Mallory had to make a flow chart to track all of the characters.
  • Women deserve respect – even in 1984.
  • Karen’s nipples are erotic.
  • George Michael’s Father Figure is problematic.
  • Hollywood Wives was an ABC mini series featuring many famous stars of the day.
  • Buying babies from brokers.
  • Hollywood Wives contains loads of incest and child abuse.
  • There are always consequences for actions.
  • Mallory’s Theory: Breach babies are murderers.
  • Vaginism: An Education – learn all about vaginal spasms
  • When you have exotic sex, strange things can happen.
  • Tamu’s deep love for Jackie Collins and her writing style.
  • Mallory’s deep hatred for all of the characters in this book.
  • Tamu’s Aha! Moment: Jackie Collins books trained her for Sons of Anarchy which trained her for Game of Thrones.
  • Mallory finds Van Helsing to be complex, yet intriguing.

Apologies: Eating was occurring during the recording of this episode, along with much drinking, so sorry for the chewing and talking with our mouths full –we classy!

Holiday Bonanza: Bad@Love Goes to the Minnesota State Fair

Labor Day marks the unofficial end of summer and what better way to send it off than to partake in a time honored Minnesota tradition eating and drinking our way through the “Great Minnesota Get-Together“. For two weeks, ending on Labor Day, Minnesotans head over to The State Fair to eat anything and everything on a stick, people watch, and buy many “As Seen on TV” items.

Moral to the Story: If you ever find yourself in Minnesota at the end of August, definitely hit the MN State Fair…bring TUMS.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

  • Mallory smuggles booze in to the fair…AGAIN!
  • Tamu’s Blue Barn Blueberry Basil Lemonade Tequila cocktail.
  • Taking a ride on the oldest State Fair Ride, Ye Old Mill and experience 4 minutes of darkness.
  • Mallory really hates geese.
  • Going to Bee school; Hive Beetles are squatters, bye-bye drones, the Queen Bee’s ability to choose a bee’s sex based on the needs of the hive, and bees steal from other bees.
  • Mallory learned all about bees from Futurama’s “The Sting” episode.
  • Midwest Dairy’s Princess Kay of the Milky Way butter heads.
  • The Haunted House characters whipping and nae nae-ing.

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Artwork by Kerriann Art: https://www.instagram.com/artbykerriann/

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Flutter: We Met on Plenty of Fish…Farmer’s Only…OK, Grinder

The fun continues with our friends Jim & Ben. We ask them how they met and their opinions on love and relationships.

Moral to the Story: You make a choice to be in a relationship everyday.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

Ladies who tried to convert Jim and Ben.

Jim’s first time with a lady almost made him a baby daddy.

Politics Interlude #VOTE

Tamu won’t survive the Handmaid’s Tale

Jim still thinks we are recording a YouTube video.

As you get older, relationships become more about the friendship and sharing good times.

Take lessons from your previous relationships and learn from them.

Advice to the Bad at Love crew: Don’t give up.

More advice to the Bad at Love crew: Don’t take dating too seriously, don’t expect anything and be OK with being single.

Tamu has plenty of LEGITIMATE reasons not to date.

Ben’s Advice to Bad at Love Listeners: Share this podcast with your single male friends so they can fall in love with Mallory & Tamu!

 

 

Episode 8: How Appropriate…There’s a Wedding Outside!

In this week’s episode, Tamu and Mallory discuss the movie Sliding Doors and how their lives (both romantic and personal) might have been different if they choose another life path. Of course during the discussion, a freshly married couple are outside taking  wedding photos which was taken as a fitting sign for the two romantic cynics.

Moral to the Story: The Sliding Doors versions of Mallory and Tamu are living their best lives!

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

  • Tamu is STILL sad that the podcast is not receiving listener emails.
  • #Vote
  • New Business Idea for Amazon: Ordering weed through Alexa
  • What-ifs from the past.
  • LOVINGLY hating on the wedding photo shoot outside.
  • The many missed opportunities of Mallory and Tamu.
  • Mallory had no time for behind the scenes theater work, she wanted to Direct!
  • More tales from Tamu’s past.
  • Amaretto Sours are just wrong.
  • Mallory’s parent’s Sunday Funday.
  • Wine interlude: If you live in/or are visiting the Twin Cities, check out Twin Cities Wine Education.
  • According to Mallory, Teddy Roosevelt is a type of white.
  • Tamu is a terrible human.
  • Sex and the City Question: What is OK to do before someone says, “I Love You?”
  • Advice from Mallory: Get yourself a man who will wipe your ass when you need it.
  • If Tamu had gone forward with any of her alternative life paths, she would have never have her current life and the people in it…and this podcast *gasp*.
  • What are the jay walking laws in England?
  • Gerry is the worst!
  • Friends 2018 would be hipsters in Williamsburg & still with no black friends!
  • British people LOVE Monty Python.
  • #Vote

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Artwork by Kerriann Art: https://www.instagram.com/artbykerriann/

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Flutter: Jim & Ben – An Airing of Grievances

It is a Festivus for the rest of us in July! Our beloved superfan Jim (a.k.a Tamu’s gusband) and his boyfriend Ben (a.k.a., Tamu’s gusband-in-law) stop by for a visit. Jim has been a supporter and silent (but not really) show adviser since our Trashy Book Nook days. Since he sends Tamu opinion texts while listening to each episode, it was decided to give him the mic to air his grievances. ENJOY!

Moral to the Story: Love your friends, even if they think Molly Ringwald’s Pretty in Pink  dress was a fashion sensation.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

Mallory’s dad made a good camouflage dress.

The time Prince gave Jim his guitar at a concert.

Molly Ringwald is NOT a fashion designer.

An exploration into all of the reality TV Tamu watches.

Staircase Prep 101: Write a journal with all of your secrets just in case an owl attacks.

 

Episode 7: Heartaches and Dusty Diaphragms

In this week’s episode, Mallory and Tamu explore ways to get over a relationship by watching 2001’s  Someone Like You and discussing local Minnesota rapper Dessa’s experiment with neuroscience to pinpoint the parts of her brain where emotions of love were triggered by her former lover with whom she was broken up with (but he was still in her life) for 12 years. She then used neurofeedback to train her brain to work differently.

Moral to the Story: With practice, we can find our very own Hugh Jackman.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

  • Tamu is still butt hurt about not getting listener emails at badatlovepodcast@gmail.com
  • Dessa’s new album Chime and her older songs.
  • Dessa would have had her songs added to Tamu’s Banned@Love playlist.
  • It was cute to see life pre-internet in Someone Like You
  • New Cow Theory
  • Hugh Jackman reaffirms that we should have fun.
  • Protect your holes.
  • Back in the 2000s no one believed in padding.
  • It is easier to run than to be vulnerable.
  • Beyoncé don’t play.
  • Plan to internet date around the world.

Read about Dessa’s brain scan

Listen to Dessa’a new album Chime

 

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Artwork by Kerriann Art: https://www.instagram.com/artbykerriann/

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Email us: badatlovepodcast@gmail.com

 

Flutter: The Bullets We’ve Dodged

In this week’s episode, Tamu & Mallory brave the heat to share their stories of the one that got away.

For Tamu, it is Idris Elba but, it is his fault. For Mallory, it is Neil Patrick Harris (which is not going to work for obvious reasons).

Moral to the Story: Have more fun, take some chances, give some handies, get some handies..safely.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

  • Being scared to ruin things.
  • Missed vibes.
  • Summer goals for hookups – not really gonna happen because someone is gonna catch feelings.
  • Release the fear.
  • Korean dramas = Pride and Prejudice + Motorcycle Deaths
  • Veronica Mars has too many blonde dudes.
  • Mallory does not trust emotions.
  • Mallory scared she will fall in love with a Trump supporter.
  • Jurassic Chomp from DQ is how Mallory learned that there was a Jurassic Park movie coming out.
  • It would be awesome to friends with Idris.
  • What would Idris’ music playlist be? 
  • Tamu’s love of Bollywood.
  • Tamu has not listened to Hamilton’s soundtrack.
  • Celebrity crush playlists.
  • Tamu is still butthurt that no one is emailing: badatlovepodcast@gmail.com.

Check out our playlist; What Would Idris Listen To: A Playlist on Spotify

P.S.: There a ghost that likes to visit during recordings. If you hear some interference, it is ”Frank”.

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Episode 6.2: Mallory, The Bachelorette Cynic

In the exciting second part of this thrilling episode, Mallory continues to watch the contesticles get out of cars and drink, and dunk basketballs, and critique each other’s clothes in the name of “love”.

Moral to the Story: Be honest because telling people in advance you have warrants, are a homophobe, a racist, a virgin, or, a persistent gentleman will surely still get you on a romance reality competition show.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

  • Mallory had REAL issues with Jake from Minneapolis.
  • What is your patronus? The new pick up line for the zillennials? Perennials? Whatever the new millennials are called.
  • Shout out to Shoulda Swiped Left Podcast for keeping it real about the dating world.

 

Episode 6.1: Mallory The Cynical Bachelorette

Welcome to Bad at Love’s version of Mystery Science Theater 3000. This time, Tamu introduces Mallory to The Bachelorette, or as she calls it, “I like you. Don’t like you. Go away. You can stay.” We are sort of timely because the show is actually still on, however, this is episode one and the show is seven weeks in!

Moral to the Story: Sage your vag for a fresh start.

Other Fun Topics Discussed:

  • The introduction of the “Pensive Gentleman” who will forever be known as “Persistent Gentleman”.
  • One of these dudes is a life collector of accoutrements.
  • Man buns…pass
  • Mallory loves the Harlem Globetrotters.
  • There is new job title called “Social Media Participant” which we can all add to our resumes!